surreal reality .

I'm tired . . But I can't seem to fall asleep until after my thoughts collect & until after my mind is cleared .
Today was something like a refreshment ,
It felt good to get away from the stuffy awkwardness that surrounded me yesterday & the day before .
It was starting to become toxic . .
I love my boyfriend , dearly . . But I hate how time always flies when we're together .

It's funny how everything is supposed to happen for a reason .
A *specific* reason .

I'm still contemplating the reasons behind monday's events .

I'm so happy he didn't give into the comments that were made .
It goes to show where he stands in this relationship , -despite his thoughts of throwing in the towel .

& unexpectedly , both of my parents reacted somehow different than I had previously expected .
I guess this is helping me get to know them a little better . .

This was both strikes 1 and 3 .
Darren & I both can't afford for anything else to happen .

I'm trying to stay positive , & with that , I'm also trying to see things through an optimistic view .

I have no clue why I live for tomorrow when tomorrow's not even promised .
This could be a reason why I stress .

I'm just trying to move forward . .

But it seems as if I have my head in tomorrow & my feet still stuck standing in today.
I've learned to keep my head forward & my eyes off of yesterday .




I'm slowly falling asleep . . .