Major Venting.

This was on my mind this morning. I just figured I'd let it all out.
You most likely won't see this anyway..

Ohkay so, what's going on?
I don't understand you sometimes.
You had me "out" of your life at one point like intended,
couldn't stand not havin' me in your life,
so you decided you wanted me back in it.
& it's like, im just there..

We've been talking since June, & already meet certain characteristics of a "couple".
But the thing is, we aren't a couple.
What the hell. I feel like I'm missing something.
Like theres something you aren't tellin' me.
Be honest with me! Shit..
How can you love someone, when it seems like you don't wanna be with them?;
because you keep putting off a "relationship".
I'm not asking much from you when it comes to that,
& im not begging you for all your attention.
I hate havin' to express my feelin' for you,
and havin' to keep puttin' myself out there
when it comes to my love for you & everything,

because it doesn't feel mutual.

I'm not asking for reassurement,
its just, if you love me show it.

Don't give me some sloppy ass,
12:30 a.m. text message sayin, "Nite. love ya."
when you had oportunities to talk to me,
or at least let me hear your voice.
I mean, she probably hears it everyday.
Lucky her..

She'll talk to you in the morning,
I won't.

Let me just stop gettin' my hopes up,
thinkin' that this is truely something that i've dreamed of,
because i can't deal with any more disappointments.